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Jacobe Veterinary Clinic: Avoid At All Costs!

If you want a vet who will be condescending, negative and rude, Jacobe Veterinary Clinic in Marcelo Green Village is the place for you.

I brought my dog "P" to the clinic for his regular grooming. Now my dog, like most Shih Tzus, has a skin infection which causes flaking. Our regular vet at Animal House already prescribed medication for him, which I administer regularly. Sometimes this flaking causes itchiness, and my dog chews on his own fur, resulting in a few tangles in parts. So all I needed from the folks at Jacobe was for them to cut my dog's hair in a puppy cut and remove the tangles.

But when I got there and was just starting to explain the situation, the vet in residence (RON DELATADO) immediately cut me off and said that my dog's fur was tangled all over, he must be shaved completely, and that a puppy cut was simply impossible. I said that only the "hot spots" had tangles and if they could just try a puppy cut since they had done it for my dog two times previously, thank you. But the "vet" continued to insist that no, it was impossible.

Delatado: "Hindi talaga pwede. Buhol buhol na kasi e".
Me: "Are you saying that every inch of him is tangled, when we can both clearly see that it is not true? Is that your solution to everything? Just shave him bald?"
Delatado: (in a patronizing tone) "Ma'am, ako po ang doctor dito, at oo, yan ang sinasabi ko. DAPAT KASI ARAW ARAW SINUSUKLAYAN YAN E."
Me: "EXCUSE ME. DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME THAT I AM NOT DOING EVERYTHING FOR MY PET BECAUSE I AM, AND EXCUSE ME, I DO COMB MY PET'S HAIR EVERY DAY, BUT LIKE I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU, HE TRIES TO CHEW IT OFF!"

And yes, I was already talking to him in English while he still kept speaking in Tagalog because when I get really angry, I revert to English with a strong American accent. And a sassy finger wag.

Then he proceeded to lift my dog by his front paws to look at his stomach! My dog is always stressed out whenever I bring him to the groomer's or vet anyway, so coupled with this treatment he was unable to control himself and peed, right on the vet's scrubs. How did the vet respond? He got mad, said "Tsss!" in a peevish way, and just let go of "P". Whenever this happened at other groomers or clinics, nobody reacted because they understood that animals really do get stressed and do all sorts of stuff. But this supposed "vet" at Jacobe actually got mad!

No vet - and I have gotten to know a lot over the years of being a pet owner - has ever been so condescending to me, ever. No one has ever shamed me for not taking enough care of my pet. Hello. The fact that I bring him regularly for treatments should be enough indication that this is no mere street animal! And vets are supposed to be more compassionate, because what else would compel you to choose a career caring for creatures who can't thank you personally or pay you back?

The only reason I brought my dog to Jacobe was because of convenience - it's just a 10-minute drive from our house, and we don't even have to use the service road.  But after this treatment, convenience is no longer a factor. I will never again subject myself to the behavior of this rude and stupid douchebag.

The Doctor is IN...SUFFERABLE.

Movie Review: Jersey Boys

I saw the Jersey Boys movie last week with my niece and I loved it. I have to mention that I went with my niece because she'll get huffy if creds are not given. They made me wait a month after its release in the US, and made me go to the far land of Makati because it was only playing in select theaters here, but it was worth it.

I am a huge fan of the musical.  I play the cast recording all the time, and I may also have the teensiest crush on John Lloyd Young. Teensy tiny crush. He played the original Frankie Valli on Broadway and won a Tony for it. He came back to Broadway after a few years and also performed on the West End.  You already know that the musical is about how Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons came to be, right? It's sometimes referred to as a jukebox musical, in a derogatory way. This is totally wrong. Jukebox musicals are so called because they take the already-released hits of a composer or singer and fit them in the context of a play. But Jersey Boys is about a singing group, and the songs are performed chronologically - from their first hit to their last. The musical is about their story, and the highlights just happen to be hit songs. And if you've been exposed to any form of TV or radio in the past 30 years, you would know these hits - "Sherry", "Big Girls Don't Cry", "Walk Like A Man", "Working My Way Back To You", "Who Loves You", etc. Personally, the one song I was aware of was "Walk Like A Man" because of its use in the movie Heart and Souls. I loved that, so I was prepared to love Frankie Valli. Also, he did sing the theme song to Grease.

Movie adaptations of Broadway musicals are, more often than not, epic fails. See: Rock of Ages, the biggest gob of spit in Broadway's face. Seriously, Tom Cruise proved that he was the biggest dementor of them all for sucking all the joy and fun out of that musical, and basically for sucking everyone else's will to live. But Clint Eastwood did everything right with Jersey Boys.

First of all, he got the original Broadway actor to play Frankie. Even if it's been 9 years since he started the role. Almost all major roles went to stage actors who played their movie roles on the stage as well. The exceptions he made to this rule were also perfect - Vincent Piazza plays the crucial role of Tommy DeVito, who serves as the foil for Frankie, and he was just "Can't Take My Eyes Off You"-incredible. (See what I did there?) And also, Christopher Walken. Has Walken ever sucked at anything? I don't think so.

Secondly, Eastwood got the musical writers to work on the screenplay. And it showed. Throughout the movie I could feel the respect for the original material. Of course, you have to have a different set of expectations when watching a movie based on a musical. Not everything is going to be the same. In this case, there was more backstory development, some songs were expanded, which was great - and some were shortened or cut altogether. This was my one gripe - they totally cut "Fallen Angel"! That would have been a perfect moment for Frankie. That song comes at one of the most poignant moments in the play, but for some reason that I honestly still can't understand, Eastwood decided to leave that out. All we heard was the intro as a sort of instrumental background.

Having said all that, I really felt that the film captured the essence of the play. Most of the dialogue was actually a word for word reproduction from the play. And the actors sang live, which gave the musical performances a raw genuineness and warmth. And these are Broadway actors, people, which means they have the chops! And the last scene, from the Hall of Fame Induction, just gave me goosebumps all over. By the time of the finale, which was almost the same as in the play and was a fitting tribute to it, I was barely keeping it together trying not to cry. You could tell that the crowd at the theater also got into it because everyone burst into spontaneous applause after that last scene.

The movie soundtrack is also another reason to be happy. The title says "Music From The Motion Picture and Broadway Musical", so you get versions from the play, original versions from The Four Seasons, and of course the recordings from the movie. And you get mashups of The Four Seasons and John Lloyd Young! The seamless transition from Frankie's voice to John's means, as my sister tells me, that they sang in the same key. Which really... isn't John Lloyd Young awesome?

I know there have been some mixed reviews for this movie, but I for one was extremely satisfied. I give it a score of 99% (because damnit, I wanted my "Fallen Angel"!) and I cannot wait for the DVD to come out so I can watch it again and again and again.

Facebook is controlling our emotions!

There's all this hoopla about a recent study that revealed how Facebook conducted a social experiment on unwitting people. Supposedly they chose a group of users and controlled the tone of the items that showed up on their feed. Those who got mostly negative stories reported feeling bad after a while, while those who got the positive stories were either as happy or happier afterwards.

First of all, WELL DUH. Did we really need a study to tell us this? That's why there's the unfollow button, everyone. Use it! This is seriously one of the best updates Facebook has introduced, ever. It lets you control the content of your feed while still keeping those all-important superficial connections alive. Because we don't want to hurt the feelings of those people that we don't really care about in real life.

Another life-changing Facebook update? The "I don't want to see this story" option. Again, use it! It's a gift from the gods! If Facebook tries to shove an assy suggested post down your throat, shove it right back.

And are we really surprised that Facebook would do this? We practically have to sign our souls away the moment we set up an account. Look at how they ruined Instagram! Everybody knows that Facebook is the apocalypse and Mark Zuckerberg is the devil.

Why You Gotta Be So Ruuude?

So are you already obsessed with Rude by MAGIC! ?
All it takes is one listen and you will be hooked. This has been on repeat on my computer for days.

When you get to the transition in the chorus ("Marry that girl"), I dare you not to jump around and do your best reggae dance move.

10 Best Lyrics Ever

Based on a totally unscientific, non-music-theory-based analysis. Which means I just really like them.

1. "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." - The End, The Beatles

My favorite lyric ever. So much so that I had it permanently etched on to my skin. It basically encapsulates the Golden Rule and all religious philosophies in two lines. Paul McCartney is a genius.

2. "We'll shine like stars in the summer night, we'll shine like stars in the winter light. One heart, one hope, one love. " - With Or Without You, U2

This is the coda to With Or Without You that Bono only ever sings live. This was never recorded and it's a treat for fans if he decides to sing it at concerts. Knowing it's not on any album makes the existence of the words even more special.

3. "Well, I'm standing on a corner in Winslow, Arizona and such a fine sight to see.  It's a girl, my Lord, in a flatbed Ford slowin' down to take a look at me." - Take It Easy, Eagles

Try singing it - so many words but everything flows together so smoothly. And try singing it without cracking a smile - it's impossible!

4. "You got that hair slicked back and those Wayfarers on, baby." - Boys of Summer, Don Henley

Is there any other song that evokes the mood of summer better than this one? And this line made me determined to buy Wayfarers.

5. "I've looked at life from both sides now, from win and lose and still somehow, it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all." - Both Sides Now, Joni Mitchell

Because really, we don't know shit.

6. "You ask me to enter but then you make me crawl, and I can't be holding on to what you got when all you got is hurt." - One, U2

The song that saved U2. And the line that proves that Bono is God...-like.

7. "Going back to the corner where I first saw you, gonna camp in my sleeping bag I'm not gonna move." - The Man Who Can't Be Moved, The Script

You can almost feel Danny O'Donoghue's heart being ripped out. Also another wordy lyric that is just perfect when sung out loud.

8. "You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead." - Two Of Us, The Beatles

Paul has said that he wrote this for Linda. But music journalists also point out that he wrote this when The Beatles were falling apart, so this was also about John. Doesn't that make you just want to bawl your eyes out?

9. "I've been tryin' to get down to the heart of the matter but everything changes and my friends seem to scatter, but I think it's about forgiveness." - The Heart of the Matter, Don Henley

Don Henley is the master of the powerful realization.

10. "I may not always love you but long as there are stars above you, you never need to doubt it, I'll make you so sure about it, God only knows what I'd be without you." - God Only Knows, The Beach Boys

People never seem to get that this is a love song. You have to get past the first line! That's the twist to it all. I think it's called irony. I also think it's one of the best songs ever.

10 Reasons To Love Wimbledon

Wimbledon is already underway. I am not as enthusiastic about this since my boy Rafa is struggling to hold his serve in the first round as we speak. But I've decided to list my reasons to love this Grand Slam and all the traditions that make it unique. Maybe this will cheer me up.


1. It's played on grass.

The only Grand Slam left to do so. The US and Aussie Open used to be played on grass too, a long time ago, but now only Wimbledon is left. Grass is supposedly very difficult because the ball doesn't bounce as high, is very fast, and travels unpredictably. So it's perfect for serve-and-volleyers like Sampras and Borg. Though of course we know even those who are mostly baseliners or grinders like Nadal can succeed. Grass can also be very slippery, so every year you see some pretty interesting falls (as long as nobody gets hurt, of course).

Sampras equaled Emerson's then-record of 12 Slams at Wimbledon, and is
tied with Federer for most singles titles at 7./www.totalprosports.com

2. Tennis whites.

Wimbledon is the only Grand Slam tournament that requires players to wear predominantly white clothing. You'll find no garish neon shirts, loud colors or abysmally designed tennis dresses here *coughSerenacough*. This gives The Championships a serene and pristine air about it.

3. There's only one players' box.

At Wimbledon, unlike the other Grand Slams, the players' families and friends have to sit in one box only. They are literally sitting in two rows, one in front of the other. You can imagine the dilemma this gives their supporters - can you be as loud as you want while cheering for your guy? How much do you have to dial it down as consideration for the other side? And the camera's numerous and frequent cutaways to the two girlfriends,  showing the two extremes of emotions - one is almost always biting her nails while the other is pumping her fists - are as entertaining as the match itself.

4. Strawberries and cream.

Do you know any other Grand Slam, let alone any other sports event, where strawberries and cream are routinely consumed by the spectators? Only at Wimbledon!

5. Players have to leave together after every match, and curtsey to the Royal Box.

Losers can't just skulk away or throw tantrums while heading to the locker rooms. Both players have to leave the court together, which also means the winner can't go around basking in his victory and keeping the loser waiting. And if the Queen or Prince of Wales is present, both players have to curtsey to the Royal Box together. How classy.

6. Wimbledon has its own seeding system.

Wimbledon doesn't care if you're No. 1 in the ATP rankings. Wimbledon will just give you a very stiff and British, "Oh. Jolly good. Well done." and then go right back and seed you No. 10. Their rankings are based on the performance of the players at the championships. So even if you happen to be No. 12 in the world, but you've won the trophy a couple of times, you can still be the top seed.  Sort of puts the players in their place.

7. Women are called Miss or Mrs. when announcing the scores.

So unlike in the other Grand Slams it's, "Game, Miss Sharapova." And it's the Gentlemen's, not just Men's Singles. Very polite.

8. It's actually The Championships of a very elite club.

What we all know as Wimbledon is actually The Championships of the All England Lawn Tennis Club. And the club is so elite that only tournament winners get to become members. And also if you happen to have made any notable contributions to tennis. But the winners become lifetime members. All for winning seven matches.


9. No sponsors' ads around the court.

Look closely. The sidelines are unmarred!

10. The Centre Court tradition.

It's such a given that it's become one of the perks of winning the Championships - the next year, you know you'll be playing the 2 pm opener at Centre Court. It's the place of honor awarded to Champions, like kicking off the festivities. It announces to the world that whatever happens this year and for at least one match, you're still the reigning Champion. Champion coming through!

Wimbledon is pretty awesome. It only becomes not awesome if Nadal doesn't win. It's not looking particularly promising this year but still, vamos Rafa.

Nadal won in an epic final in 2008, so epic that if it had lasted one more point,
it would have been too dark to continue./www.mirror.co.uk

Spanish Team Get Regular Jobs in Ad

This is sweet. Also, Xabi in scrubs! That is all.

[World Cup 2014] Spain's Farewell Match

This is not a football blog. But I can't seem to stop writing about the World Cup. So many thoughts! So many emotions!

Spain and Australia played their last game in the World Cup last night. So this is what a no-bearing match looks like. Spain won 3-0, but the whole game felt like a eulogy, with the announcer endlessly talking about the end of an era, bidding farewell, signing off. At one point, the word dotage even came up when he discussed David Villa's future. Dotage! Who would not feel depressed watching this? Their past two games have felt like a long-drawn out goodbye. Spain wore black in this match, which The Guardian said was fitting since it was like their own funeral. (Sidebar: whatever FIFA rule made Spain wear their away kits, Thank You!)

The first goal was scored by David Villa off the inside of his right foot which was kind of like a behind the back pass in basketball. But his reaction, along with his teammates', was more a sigh of relief. The same thing happened when Torres scored the second goal. No smiles, no celebration, just a few congratulatory hugs and pats from some of his teammates, those who happened to be near him. And the last goal from Juan Mata went through the goalkeeper's legs. Through his legs! Does that even happen in real life? And still the Spanish team was very subdued. As if even the goals were painful. As if all the joy was sucked out of their beings. (Which it probably was, considering what happened. High hopes dashed.) Their goals were more like, "Oh look. We scored a goal." vs "GOOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!" 

The Brazilian crowd were not very nice either. The announcement of Spain's national anthem was met by boos.

And now that The Guardian has pointed it out, I can't stop thinking about David Villa's reaction as he was pulled from the game, something I just filed away in my brain last night. This is his last international match, and as he sat down on the bench, he put his head in his hands and cried.

This match was all about, as the kids would say, the feels. It was so sad and quiet. Like a funeral.

Four years ago I was eyes-deep in a job that sucked the soul out of me, I had no time to follow sports, and they didn't show all the World Cup games on TV. Now I have all the time in the world, and we're getting all the games live, and all my teams are gone. Just when I finally, finally got what offside means!

Goodbye, my babies.
(Now, some fuzzy snapshots of my TV)

Loving the black away kit

Sergio Ramos really did a reverse Samson - his hotness increased
exponentially with the shorter hair and perfect scruff

Sad Torres

Sad Xabi

I Am Not A Fan of the USMNT.

It is so hard for me to like the USMNT right now. Throughout this World Cup, all you hear is the American press whining reminding us again and again and again that they hate the World Cup anyway. That the American players will never stoop so low as to flop regularly, as the rest of the world seems to do. That this is simply against American values.  Then you see Kyle Beckerman elbowing an opponent who's already sprawled on the field.

There's nothing dirtier than a dirty player pretending to be clean. Geez. The American [press] only hate soccer -IT'S FOOTBALL, GET OVER IT - because they suck at it. The one time they are not the absolute best at anything, so of course they can't take it. Whatever. But when they do start winning, they act entitled and as if they expected this all along. And suddenly they LOOOOOVE soccer (FOOTBALL!).

That's the trouble with being almighty, you see. You don't know how to take the hard knocks. The moment you're not the supreme ruler of the empire of soccer (FOOTBALL!) you dismiss everybody else who happens to be good at it, and everybody else who happens to be a fan. You hide behind your massive inferiority complex and call yourselves #OUTLAWS because hey, it's cool to not be good at this, we're rebels. And you keep making excuses that these are not your best athletes anyway. Sour grapes much? And then you happen to win, and suddenly WE'RE NUMBER 1! TEAM USA!

This team and its [press] is just so damn arrogant. And however far they make it this year, they're not winning themselves a lot of new non-American fans.

Goodbye, Hot World Cup Teams

Let us bid farewell to the hottest teams ever to play in the World Cup.

3. Ahh, England. They look like the kind of guys you can have a beer with at the pub - handsome, but not in a threatening kind of way. Very accessible. They clean up good!

 2. Hot dayum, Italia! Technically, they can still make it if they beat Uruguay in their next match. But they are hanging by a thread. So let's just celebrate these works of art in suits. The Italians' handsomeness is more like the kind that can blind you if you look too long. Kinda like the sun - you can't look at them directly. And they seem like the kind of guys who know more about Dolce & Gabbana (who dressed them) and Prada than you do. VERY nice to look at, but definitely out of our collective leagues.

Here's one more of Claudio Marchisio, for good measure.

And the hottest team in the 2014 World Cup is....

1. Ay ay ay! La Furia Roja!

Siiighhh... Just the right level of beauty that won't blind you or make you explode like the Italians, with just the right amount of accessible good guy charm like the Brits. This collection of football beauty may never be seen in this world again. And football skills-wise, which is apparently important too,  this team's era of dominance is all but over. Both their losses were just heartbreaking to watch, with the team basically looking like a deer caught in the headlights. Adios, hombres calientes.

Roger Federer Is A Sore Loser

This is why.

There's something really unsportsmanlike in belittling your opponent's skills and hiding it under a cloak of objective analysis. C'mon Roger, if you're gonna talk smack, at least have the balls to do it straight out.

I don't understand why everyone hails Federer as the greatest tennis champion who ever walked the earth.  When he loses a match, he NEVER gives the credit to his opponent. He always comes up with an excuse why he didn't play so well. In his mind, the opponent is never better than him - it's just that sometimes he (Federer) played poorly.

And this artfully veiled criticism of Nadal from a man who hasn't won a Grand Slam in two years? You have got to be kidding me. You gotta grow a pair, Roger.

Dear Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield: GET OVER YOURSELVES.

The latest from this pair of nimrods:

Photos: MaxNY/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES

"Ooh! Please paparazzi, don't look at us! We don't want the attention that our fame as movie stars gets us, in this public job we chose and that's giving us this ridiculously pampered life! We don't want the fame, just support these charities instead! We dislike the fame and photos so much that we took the time while having our intensely private coffee to write down the names of our favorite charities for our fans! But we don't want to be famous, no! We don't want to call attention to ourselves so we'll just walk around with notes taped to our faces! Just keep on following us and get more telephoto shots so our fans can make out our teeny tiny handwriting! Ooh! We're just a couple of hat-wearing hipster asshats who happen to be NOBLE!"

Bunch of pretentious, self-righteous emobags.

It's Paul McCartney's Birthday!

OMG! He's 72 today! Happy happy birthday Paul!

This personal playlist is dedicated to you!

And please get better soon!

Dries Merten's Hand Heart

Oh Dries. I was beginning to like you. Congrats on scoring a game-winning World Cup goal, but flashing your hand heart just erased all the love. Whyyyyyyy.

Screen grab from a non-World Cup 2014 Youtube video

More Thoughts On Blogging

I've been browsing through the many blogs available here on Blogger, and I just have to say I'm inspired by everything I'm seeing.  I'm amazed at how creative people are - how did they make their post look like that? how did they post this image? etc. The way they write is also inspiring - the posts that stand out for me are those whose authors have a calm and clear voice. They make me want to get to know them more.   I've added more feeds to the "Blogs I Follow" section.  I literally got lost for hours just going through more blogs.  The only thing that's stopping me now is the fact that my fingers are actually hurting. So amazed.

Mister Beebop Has A New Look

Hey, Mister Beebop had a makeover!

I've been playing around with my blog's colors and format all day and I've come up with my favorite overall look.  The hardest part was the colors - I probably should've paid more attention the day they taught us the color wheel and complementary colors (I even started out typing it as complimentary colors! Hah. Must be some really polite colors there.) I've also added a section all about Mister Beebop. I like my new header image - I'm a total bookworm so the bookshelf is so me. And I'm interested in a lot of different topics, which I write about, so it's like the books represent that too.  I'm also sharing a list of the blogs I follow and the music I'm listening to lately.

I started this blog a year ago, and I posted just once until I revived it last month.  I was discouraged for a while because I knew I couldn't just limit myself to one blog topic. And you could also say life got in the way - all my energies were bent on trying to get through my day (that will be a topic for another post).  I didn't know if I could do this, or even have something to write about.  But I have some time now, and I'm really enjoying this whole sharing and writing thing.  I'm also learning a whole lot about social media and HTML - and I barely passed my computer classes in school! Who knew. It turns out I do have something to say, and I hope I can continue doing this.

More soon.

Portugal Loses To Germany, And I Am Bothered.

So today has not been a good day for World Cup viewing.  My genuine disappointment over Portugal's loss to Germany made me realize that, holy hell, I've really taken on Portugal as my team. Since my country (the Philippines) has never competed in the World Cup, I've mostly just enjoyed the games as an impartial observer. I support the teams that have performed well because they're easy to admire.  Think Spain and Italy. Also, it doesn't hurt if they have reeeeeally nice-looking players. So yes, my choices have been pretty shallow random.

But our family is of Portuguese heritage, which is actually the reason I started supporting them too.  And I will continue to cheer for them now even after this defeat . Aww, it's true love! We went through a crappy time together, and now our relationship is solid. HAH.  I just hope they at least put up a fight in their next match.  They practically rolled over and handed this one to the Germans. Oh well. We'll see in a couple of days.

Whovian and Proud!

The new Dr. Who is set to premiere in August, and I can tell you, I am seriously in need of a Doctor fix.

I watched all 7 series from 2005 in the space of a couple of months last year with my sister and niece. So you can imagine how the last few months without new episodes have been.  The best thing about getting into a show pretty late is the catch-up marathons.  When we started our marathon, we had this smug feeling that we had a practically never-ending supply of shows, so we would never have to wait a week for the next episode. But when we got to the last few shows, we suddenly realized that we would be just like everyone else who now had to wait for the next installment. What about the cliffhangers?!?

My love for Dr. Who started gradually, then blew up overnight.  I had been reading all sorts of references to the show and insider jokes throughout the internet. Finally, my curiosity got the better of me, and since I was also looking for a new show to watch, I got hold of the 2005 series. One episode in, Eccleston had me.

How many shows do you know have been around for 50 years? There was a brief hiatus in the 90s until it was revived in 2005. The show has been going on for so long, that you actually have to classify the original episodes as Classic Who. And because The Doctor regenerates every few years, different actors get to play the role and bring their own stamp to it.  So it has its sub-eras just like geologic periods - the Eccleston era, Tennant era, Smith era. 

And talking about the different Doctors (one of the first things you learn - the main guy's name is not Doctor Who, he is simply "The Doctor." "Doctor Who" is a question) is like those lessons you had in Social Studies, where you talk about Presidents and their achievements. Christopher Eccleston is credited for bringing the Doctor back to life. His Ninth Doctor was a bit cocky and sassy, with a wry sense of humor. David Tennant, the Tenth Doctor, played him a bit more intensely and dramatically (there were a lot more screamy scenes with Tennant), though the sense of humor was not lost. And Matt Smith, number Eleven, played him like a crazy and lovable overgrown child. He's my favorite, by the way.

When it's time for The Doctor to regenerate, you have to mentally and emotionally prepare yourself for the heart-wrenching departure. There is much attention paid to The Doctor's last words (as much as his first words after regeneration). And even after all that preparation, the tears will always flow. And I'm talking about bawling here, the kind that actually leaves your eyes and nose swollen and red, the kind that you carry with you to work even after a few days. I can't remember any TV show that has made me cry this much since, ever.  And then there are those episodes that catch you off-guard, that start out all light and funny until they hit you right in the gut and you bawl all over again (I'm looking at you, Angels Take Manhattan!).

You always start out hating the new Doctor. When Tennant first came in, I kept saying I would never like him - he's just Barty Crouch Jr! Fast forward to his last episode, and I was crying my eyes out. His departure was actually stretched out over a couple of episodes, which meant the tears went on and on and on. Damn you, Russell T. Davies!  

We've learned our lesson now. Since we're waiting for the new season series, my niece's solution for this insane irrational emotional investment is for us not to watch Matt Smith's last episode, until the first episode for Peter Capaldi's Twelfth Doctor becomes available. That way, we won't be so devastated because we'll eliminate the moping period. Quite ingenious, yes?

In the meantime, we will just wallow in our fangirling for now.

My phone/iPod Case - It's bigger on the inside (heh.) Shameless plug: Handcrafted by heartfelt_ph, go follow them on instagram (@heartfelt_ph) for more cute designs.

50th Anniversary commemorative books - there are supposed to be 5 more to complete the set, but these were the only ones available at Fully Booked (Eastwood Mall) at the time.

[Video] Paolo Nutini - Better Man (Acoustic)

This Is How It's Done.

This is the MOST sexist commercial ever.

Rant-o-Meter: 10/10

It begins with "Men are different. Our more active lifestyles give our scalp a beating..."

Seriously?!?

Your lifestyle is more active than whose, exactly? Are you talking about non-athletes in general? Then you should have said "Athletes are different." Then you would just come across as arrogant pr*cks in excluding the rest of us who aren't blessed with athletic prowess. But at least, not sexist.

Or are you talking about non-footballers? Then the script should have just said "Football players are different." Now that would have been offensive on a whole other level.

So what exactly do you want to say here, Clear? Could you be talking about - gasp! - women? That men have more active lifestyles than women? Because there are no women footballers? Because there are no female athletes? Nooo... No one could be that stupid, right?

If you're pushing a product for men, wouldn't it have been better to say something like "Men's scalps are different"?  Yes, it's not the most elegant of sentences, but that's your job, copywriters.   The message should be clear (oh look! is that a pun?) and not offensive in any way.

I swear, every time I see this commercial I want to hurl something at those Younghusbands. SERIOUSLY.

Way to effing go, Clear.  Good job.

Why I Love and Hate World Cup Football

Every four years I go all out with World Cup fever, with the merchandise to prove it. I mentioned in a previous post that I love staying up at all hours of the night to watch live matches. And some of them are really worth watching - last night's Netherlands vs Spain match was jaw-dropping.  The World Cup is the biggest party on the planet and of course I don't want to miss out.

There's also the fact that football has the hottest athletes of any sport. Everybody knows that. And I'm not such a pretender that I can't admit that's one of the biggest draws for me.  I mean, just take a look at the sampling below (which does not even include the ENTIRE Spanish team):

Clockwise from Top Left: Ben Foster (ENG)/Telegraph; Alexander Kerzhakov (RUS)/ThePlace2; Xabi Alonso (ESP)/Telegraph; Claudio Marchisio (ITA)/Tumblr.

But is there any way to change the way football is shown on TV? When you're watching on TV, you're basically just seeing 20 tiny people running around. I have this theory that if they showed matches from field-level, you'd get more casual fans hooked. Think about it - with the bird's eye view, you never see the skills of the players in handling the ball, or their speed.  I've seen a couple of live football matches, and the one thing I was surprised to see was the speed and how the game moves. And that was just a college game! It just doesn't translate well on TV.  With basketball and baseball, you get to see the players up close so their skills are really on show. Why can't that happen in football?  They have goal line technology anyway, so surely different camera angles are possible?  Is it a rule that the whole field must be visible at all times?

And can someone explain why the fans NEVER STOP SINGING? They seriously. never. stop. What is up with that? Nothing is more annoying. Just writing about it now is getting me all riled up. Can't we just cheer in bursts like in other sports?


And we could use some lively announcers too. Or are they all required to be monotonous?

So many questions. But it's not like I'll stop watching any time soon. Are you kidding me? I already have plans to stay up/wake up insanely early for England vs Italy. Can't wait.

Battle of the World Cup Songs: Pitbull and JLo Vs. Ricky Martin

(Spoiler Alert: RICKY MARTIN WINS.)


How in hell is Ricky Martin's song 'Vida' not the official World Cup anthem? 

I watched the opening of the World Cup with a very open mind: tree people and ball heads? Okaay. Capoeira? Cool! JLo's sparkly green leotard? Ok, I like green. Pitbull's inexplicable pants? Well, I'm getting used to guys wearing capris anyway. And that song? I guess songs aren't supposed to sound good when performed in a humongous stadium because of sound and projection issues, right? JLo's singing was definitely proving that.

But this was before I realized that there's this other song floating around as part of the World Cup album. In my mind, 'La Copa De La Vida' is the quintessential World Cup song anyway. Then I find out that Ricky Martin has another song out for this year's tournament. Seriously. How can it not be the official song? It's got a great hook and production that actually screams Brazil.  Sure, the lyrics are pretty standard as far as football songs go ("La vida buena!"), but at least there's a discernible melody. (Actually, I already have a favorite line: "sonreir y celebrar" or "to smile and to celebrate". How perfect is that?) And Ricky Martin can actually SING.

Shouldn't the World Cup song make you want to throw up your hands and dance? Not, oh I don't know, throw rocks at the TV? It should make you feel the spirit of the host country or the tournament. With that 'Ole, Ola' song, all I see is JLo making FIERCE! faces. There's something definitely plastic and fake about it. And we all know that Claudia Leitte is just the token Brazilian to appease the host country, but really it would've been better if she wasn't included in the first place. In the opening number she was just made to look like JLo's backup dancer. Seriously.

I finally figured out that that is the reason I wasn't getting into the World Cup during the leadup - that song sucked. Now that I've heard 'Vida', I'm officially back in the game.

And because I binge-watched Ricky Martin's videos to cleanse my brain of the travesty that is 'Ole Ola', I rediscovered my long-dormant crush on him. Heehee.  Wow. The World Cup really does bring everything together.

On a final note, go listen to 'Vida'. I dare you not to feel awesome afterward!

What Would Kurt Cobain Do?

Kurt Cobain and Freddie Mercury are in my room. 

Everyday I see these two dolls (action figures?) and I wonder, if Kurt Cobain or Freddie Mercury were alive today, would they like the music industry? What would they think of autotune? Or Katy Perry? I think about this so often that I've actually had dreams of the two of them. My niece says it's because the dolls come alive at night. I just scared myself there for a bit.

Since I'll never get to ask them these questions, I'll just write them down and imagine what it would be like if Kurt and Freddie, along with John Lennon and Jeff Buckley, were still alive.



1. Kurt Cobain

This imagined scenario is the saddest for me, because this is one I really, really wish would come true. I remember vividly where I was when I first learned of Cobain's death - in the car with my family, after a Sunday lunch out. A newspaper peddler was walking along the street and I saw the headline. Yes kids, this was way before the internet, or Twitter or Facebook. I was so shocked because I was just starting to find out for myself what music I liked, and I was beginning to be a fan of Nirvana.

Kurt Cobain would have been 47 this year. Can you imagine a 47-year old Cobain? I think that if he had lived, Nirvana would still have broken up at some point. He would need the time and space to deal with his demons. This would leave Dave Grohl free to still form the Foo Fighters. Cobain would just do some quiet solo stuff, but he and Grohl would still be friends. And then they would surprise everyone by doing a surprise reunion gig at Coachella! (I like to think Kurt would find Coachella cool enough.)  Nirvana would make 2 albums together - a studio one and a live album from the tour.  Then they would just separate quietly to work on their own projects.  

Kurt will strongly dislike Bieber, Miley Cyrus and Katy Perry.  And he would scoff at Idol and The Voice. He and Dave Grohl would agree wholeheartedly that instant and temporary fame through a television show is not the way to go. He probably wouldn't make as many public appearances as Grohl, but he would be there for his Hall of Fame induction. And he would tear the roof off!

2. Freddie Mercury

If he had lived, Freddie Mercury would be 65 today. 65! But a 65-year old Freddie would still be as flamboyant as ever.  And he would still have the voice. I like to think that a full-on world tour will be too much, so Queen will just do a London residency. 

Freddie would still be in the public eye and will definitely be a regular at red carpet events. I think he will be very vocal against autotune, because this is one man who never needed it.  Also, I think he would just love Lorde and The Killers.

3. John Lennon

Photo by Iain Macmillan

Lennon's biography consistently describes him as "mean". So I think it's easy to assume that Lennon today would just be angry at everybody - especially McCartney.  He would continue to think that McCartney's music is trite and meaningless.  He would scoff - scoff, I tell you! - at any hint of a Beatles reunion.  And he definitely would not be there for the Beatles' or his own induction into the Hall.  He would rudely dismiss any reporter who would dare ask him a question about the Beatles. 

He would just be doing experimental and transcendental music with Yoko Ono and working on post-modern art, whatever that means.  And he definitely would not like any of today's musicians.




4. Jeff Buckley 

Ahh, the quiet Jeff Buckley.  I can admit that I don't know a lot about Buckley.  All I know about him is what I hear in his songs.  And I think that he is too special to be tainted by the whole stardom thing. So in my imaginary world, he will turn down all requests for interviews and continue to play small, intimate venues. He won't do any festivals either, and he will continue the fight against the mainstream.  He will win several Grammys, but he will not attend a single ceremony. And no one will be able to touch his genius.






This was probably just an exercise in romantic idealism, and one that made me sadder than ever.

So let me just say: thank you, sirs. 

Thoughts on The 68th Annual Tony Awards

Let me lead this off by saying two words: Hugh. Jackman.

Hugh Jackman can do no wrong in my book. Some people were complaining that his opening number was not flashy enough. But I thought it set just the right tone for the rest of the show. And he did say that he didn't want to compete with last year's opening extravaganza. His tap dance routine was also enjoyable - how can he make it seem so cool and effortless? Also, he just seems like a genuinely nice guy. I want to be his friend.

Glad to see that Fantasia is still going strong, and that she got to sing with legendary Patti Labelle and Gladys Knight. But, was that a nip slip?

Also: I had no idea Dule Hill could do a split like that!

It was great to see Idina Menzel again, and with full voice.  I'm currently listening to the If/Then cast recording and I'm already in love with "You Learn To Live Without".  Her song number was sparse, with no backing performers or sets - just the wickedly wonderful Idina and her voice. (For the first time since the Oscars, I actually felt sorry for John Travolta when Jonathan Groff made that dig at the whole Adele Dazeem fiasco.)

What would've been great though, was if Idina and Kristin Chenoweth joined the current Elphaba and Glinda when they performed For Good to celebrate Wicked's 10th anniversary. How awesome would that have been? And also: Wicked is 10 years old?!? To be honest, I got goosebumps hearing For Good tonight.

Carole King was another highlight. I would love to get my hands on the Beautiful cast recording, just to see how they arranged her songs.  Also to hear Jarrod Spector again.

I'm very optimistic about Sting's upcoming musical.  I hope his songwriting style translates well to a play, but judging from the subject matter, it looks like his signature offbeat and ethereal music might actually work.

All in all, there were no real musical standouts for me from this year's show. Usually the Tonys is where I hear about all the new musicals coming up. This is how I discovered Wicked, Avenue Q, Spelling Bee and In The Heights, after all. But the thing with the Tonys is, even if I don't really fall in love at first listen with the musical numbers, they're still so good. The production is always pitch-perfect (sorry for the pun!). 

Hugh Jackman was the real star of the show for me. His closing performance of On Broadway was the perfect bookend, and he didn't really need to do anything flashy.  All in all it was a decent show and it left a very pleasant taste in the mouth.

How about you, what did you think of the show?

Superstition and the Sports Fan

If you think athletes are superstitious, then you have never watched a sports event with me.

Rafa Nadal has just won his 9th French Open over Novak Djokovic. This is the first time any tennis player has won a Grand Slam event this number of times. Sampras never did it, nor did McEnroe or Borg. 

And it's because I watched the whole match on mute.

Photo by Miguel Medina/AFP (Yahoo Sports)

I have been a fan of Rafa for some years now. I have actually been a fan of tennis ever since Sampras made a guest appearance on Letterman in the 90s. With Sampras, I was convinced that if I prayed hard enough and stayed focused while watching, he would win. And he did win 14 Grand Slams, so I helped right?

With Rafa, I started to notice that every time I watched his matches, he would lose. This happened in the Rome Masters and the Australian Open finals this year.  But if I changed the channel and then came back, I would see that he'd already won the set or the match.

This year, everyone was favoring Djokovic to win the French Open because he had beaten Rafa in the Rome Masters (which I watched).  I was determined to help Rafa win this time, so I did turn the TV on, then muted it. I was reading my book, playing games on my phone, and doing everything but paying attention to the match. So of course Rafa won!

Non-sports fans laugh at those of us who actually care about how are favorite athletes or teams are doing.  We're the ones who get invested in their careers and shout ourselves hoarse whether live at the stadium or in the comfort of our homes. We're the ones with our little rituals designed to contribute to victory.  For the Red Sox and DLSU Green Archers, my favored methods are not listening to pre-game analyses and not surfing the web before their games. 

But I have always felt that it's a good thing to care for something bigger than ourselves, and be a part of a global community of fans. Thanks to cable, I am glad that even if I live halfway around the world from Paris, London or Boston, I still get to watch the action unfold live, at the same time as those who are in Philippe Chatrier, Centre Court or Fenway Park.  

So now I will celebrate Rafa's win, watch the replay and read all the celebratory articles that will come out. And this summer promises to be another rich one for fans, with the World Cup and Wimbledon coming up. I am excited for my teams (Spain and Portugal) and for Rafa, who I hope will carry this French Open momentum into a Wimbledon win.  I just have to remember to keep the TV on mute.

Fat-Shame On You

I updated my profile picture on Facebook, and within 5 minutes, one of my former co-workers sent me a private message. "Hi [fatty]! HAHAHAHA". (He used the Tagalog word for fatty).

I suppose I should be thankful that he said it via private message and not in the comments section for everyone to see.  But seriously?

First of all, I am not fat. At least, not in that picture. I would not have used that as my profile if I thought I was anything but cute, hello?  And this is coming from the worst self-critic - I have stumpy legs, I don't have a waist, and I don't have hips. But I was not fat in my picture.  In fact, I thought it was a pretty slammin' photo.

Second of all, so what if I was fat?  It still does not give anyone the right to just blatantly call me fatty.

Don't get me wrong - I am not obsessed with diets or attaining a bikini body. In fact, I don't think I ever will achieve that because I just love to eat too much. And I totally support all the women out there who promote a healthy body image and loving yourself no matter what your size. It's the fact that this person felt the need to get on his phone or laptop and type that message. It's not even a comment made to my face - we haven't seen each other in 2 months, and this is the message he chose to keep in contact with me?

How are you even supposed to respond to that? My sister and niece told me to give it right back and say "Hi ugly. HAHAHAHA." But I really just wanted to ignore him - I read the message, made sure he saw the "Seen" notification (went back twice just to be safe), and DID NOT REPLY.  I even wanted to unfriend him because he was one of those shallow Facebook friends anyway - if he wasn't on my network I could not care less what happened to him at all. But something stopped me - for now.

This isn't even the first time someone told me I was gaining weight.  In that same office, someone said to me, as we were walking towards each other in the hallway, that I was getting fat. Not Hello, How are you, or How are you doing. Just that I was getting fat. I literally could not say anything except an extremely sarcastic, dripping-in-fake-sugar "Wow. Thanks."

And these people say these comments with a beaming smile and a peppy voice, as if they were saying something a) exceedingly nice b) something you need to hear c) something you want to hear. The people who say these things feel that they are extremely close to you, and that this gives them the right to make such remarks.  

For the sake of argument, think of your 5 closest friends.  Will any one of them, just one, really make that kind of remark to you?  Playful jibes are different, but even with your closest friends, you will never just tell them out of the blue that they were fat.  Even if they asked, you will tell them that whatever size they want to be is ok.  If they want to exercise or diet, great. You may even join them.  But a real friend will never be patronizing and make unsolicited comments.  

And let me just say, if you're the type of person who makes rude comments to me, we will never be close in the first place.  

I think it's more than the fat comments too. It's that these people think it's ok to make personal remarks. Were they never taught that this is bad manners?  Now that I think of it, these are the same people who think that saying "I'm just being honest" is a free pass to be rude.  To be clear, honesty and rudeness are NOT THE SAME.  Honesty is a value we try to teach our children - tell the truth and don't lie, take accountability if you did something wrong.  We do not teach our children to be rude.

I don't remember being told outright by my parents that personal remarks are rude. Maybe I just absorbed this by observing how they talk to people.  Which brings me to the conclusion that those rude people are actually to be pitied.  Their rudeness and ignorance are their problem, not mine.

Tips: How To Get Your NSO Birth Certificate, NBI Clearance, SSS/UMID

A couple of weeks ago I had to claim some work documents, for which I needed two valid government IDs. All I had was my passport because I lost both my SSS and TIN IDs some years ago, thanks to a pickpocket (damn that person!). And since I was leaving my job, I no longer had my company ID either.

I started my research on how to go about replacing these essentials, and I was helped tremendously by several bloggers who listed the steps needed. As my way of paying it forward, I'm sharing these tips now with you.

In a twisted way, you need a valid ID to get a valid ID. (I know, right). If you want your SSS ID to be replaced, you still need to present two other forms of identification.  So here's the way to work around it:

NSO Birth Certificate >> NBI Clearance >> SSS/UMID

How to Get Your NSO Birth Certificate:

1. Go to https://nsohelpline.com/

2. Click Order Now, choose Birth Certificate, select Others under Request Purpose, and indicate "for ID purposes".

3. Choose Yes if you've applied for this before, No if you haven't.

4. Fill out the required fields in the form and just make sure all the names (especially spelling) and other data are accurate.

5. Follow the rest of the instructions, including those for payment, which will be done online. (The fee is P300).

This was literally the easiest thing to do. I submitted my request on a Saturday,  and by Tuesday morning they already delivered my NSO Authenticated birth certificate. On to the next step!

How to Apply for NBI Clearance Online:

1. Follow the instructions and fill out the required fields at http://nbi.njis-ph.com/

  *Take note of the registration code that will be generated after submitting the form.  You will need this.

2. Print the form (in triplicate, to be sure) once you're done.

NOTE: If you don't have a printer, you can save the form you filled out online as a picture file, and print it elsewhere. (To save the form, click Print when prompted, then select the Microsoft XPS Document Writer as the printer name. This will allow you to save the file.)

It's also possible that, in the excitement of completing the form, you accidentally click Done because you don't have a printer installed. You can access your completed form through http://www.nbiclearance.com/nbi-clearance-print-application-form-online . Just enter the registration code you noted in step 2.

3. Prepare P115 for payment since in our case we only need the clearance for local ID purposes. 

4. Proceed to the nearest NBI Satellite Office with your printed forms, valid ID (I only had my passport) and the NSO Birth Certificate. http://www.nbi.gov.ph/  has the most updated list of satellite offices.
In my case, I went to SM Center Las Piñas. It's best to get there early so you will be done before lunch.  I got there at 6:30 AM and I was already the 70th in line.

At SM Las Piñas, you will line up near the parking lot of the mall towards the entrance, beneath a building archway, so you will at least be in the shade. They also have separate lines for walk-in applicants and online applicants, so if you come with your pre-printed forms you are already a step ahead.

There is also an office at the Muntinlupa Victory Center, but if you have other options in the South, by all means avoid going there.  It is literally in the middle of a marketplace, and you line up on a sidewalk that is so narrow it can barely fit two people.  I tried to go there at 6 AM (before ultimately deciding to go to SM Las Piñas), and the line was already going twice around the block, with about 150 people waiting.  This office also apparently has a 500-person processing cutoff per day.

5.  Wait for the officials to give you a number. Around 9 AM someone will go down the line and write this down on your application form.  

6. Follow the directions which are posted on the windows.  The line started moving around 9:30.  The first step is payment (always prepare the exact amount to minimize the hassle). As an online applicant, you get to skip the second window which is labeled BioData (although to be honest I don't know what they do there. Do they check your manually filled out forms?) and go straight to the fingerprint scanning, then the photo (the chair is just in front of the last window, in view of everybody else).

7. Exit the area and wait for your name to be called once your clearance is ready. 

By 10:30, I was done with my duly approved NBI clearance and off to have my first meal of the day at the mall. Note that at no point was I required to present any of my IDs to complete this. I won't tell you not to prepare anything when you get your clearance. As with any government procedure, it is always best to overprepare. You never know when they will change something up, and it is no use to ever argue or rationalize your way out of any discussion. It's not worth the extra stress.

You will want to bookmark this site: http://www.nbiclearance.com/ 
It's one of the most useful sites for anything you may want to know about applying for your NBI Clearance.

How to Apply for Replacement SSS ID:

And now, the finale. Armed with my passport and NBI Clearance, I now have two valid IDs! Yay! I can now apply for my replacement SSS ID.

1.  Go to  https://www.sss.gov.ph/sss/Section_View and download the E4 and R6 forms.

2. Fill them out online or print them and fill them out manually. Prepare 3 copies of the E4 and 4 copies of the R6 forms.
I lost my SSS ID (the old one that looks like a driver's license), but when you apply for a replacement, you will get the Unified Multi-Purpose ID (UMID).  There is a space for the Common Reference Number (which they will assign you, so leave it blank). There is also a space for your SSS number, which you will need to complete.  Your SSS number is different from your CRN.

3.  For replacement SSS IDs, you also need to prepare a notarized affidavit of loss. You will present this with your other application forms at the SSS office.

.  Proceed to the nearest SSS office. The Sucat branch, where I went, is right across from the entrance to BF and SM BF. Be prepared to line up outside the office, with no shade and exposed to all the fumes. I got there at 6:30 AM and there were already about 25 people ahead of me.

5. Once the office opens (at 7 AM), tell the guard you are there for a replacement SSS ID. He will give you a number for the counter that handles replacement IDs.  There are separate counters for first-time application and other transactions, so make sure you clearly state your purpose to the guard and line up at the correct counter.

6. Present your documents and two IDs to the SSS person after your number is called. She will sign off on the document and direct you to the bank to pay the replacement fee.

7. The bank (BPI) is just beside the Sucat SSS office so you only have to walk a couple of steps to pay the fee.  Luckily I was ready to pay by 9 AM so the bank was already open and I was 7th in line.

8. Present your  copies of the R6 form to the officer (not the teller) and have it receipted.

9. Pay the P300 replacement fee to the teller. 

10. Go back to the SSS office and tell the guard you will line up for the photocapture.  He will direct you to a different area for your photo and fingerprinting.

11.  Present your forms to the person in charge and wait until your name is called. Once it's your turn, you will complete the fingerprint scanning and have your picture taken.  (I asked the person if it was ok to smile - he said yes, just as long as no teeth would show. Heh.) The SSS person will also encode the data from your forms on their database.

12. Verify that all the information encoded in the database is correct and get the claim stub. Presto! You will just have to wait 2-3 months to have your UMID delivered to your door.  In the meantime, you can keep the claim stub and use it as reference in case you need any proof that you have an SSS ID.  But for the moment you already have your two valid IDs (Passport and NBI clearance) so you're already covered.

And yes, after all these lengthy steps, I was able to claim my final work documents successfully.

Here are a few other tips that hopefully will help you.

1. Always choose the online option.

If you will notice, every procedure I listed above always starts with going to the website.  Always, always go the online route. Can you imagine the hassle of going to a government office, lining up just to get a form, then having to fill everything out by hand, while you are in line? Skip it! Go online always.

A lot of people complain that the NBI offices don't differentiate between online and walk-in applicants anyway, so why bother? (Note that as mentioned above, SM Las Piñas does). But worst case, even if they don't, at least you already have your filled out form versus  having to line up for it and having to write everything down. And definitely at the SSS offices, your pre-printed forms will save you a lot of headaches.

2. Go there early.

It's not an exaggeration to say that if you arrive at any government office at 6 AM, you will not be the first in line by a long shot. But if you line up early, even if you are just waiting around, you will be done in the morning as well.  The later you arrive, the more people will already be there. And remember, this number grows exponentially, not proportionately.  Meaning, if you arrive at 7AM, it doesn't mean you will finish one hour after the person who gets there at 6.  You will finish much much later because of the queuing and accumulated bottlenecks. Imagine if you got there at 10, 11 or noon.  Kiss your day goodbye.

3. Be prepared to wait.

As in just sit around (or stand, if there is no actual waiting area) before the line even starts moving.  But as stated in 2 above, once the line does start moving, everything will happen quite quickly.

Other people recommend going with someone else so you have someone to talk to.  I myself prefer going alone because I need all my energy for keeping my sanity while waiting in an unmoving line for 4 hours. I cope by going into a zen hibernate mode.  (This is why you will notice this post has no pictures whatsoever.) While in line for my NBI clearance, the two ladies behind me did not stop talking. Honest to blog. And they drove me crazy. Which leads me to my next tip.

4. Bring your iPod, phone, a book or a magazine.

You will wait for hours so bring some diversion with you.

On a sad note, I noticed when I was lining up for my NBI clearance that I was the only one in a line of 100 people who brought a book.  No one else was reading anything, not even a magazine. It seems people would rather stare straight ahead than read a book.

5. Overprepare.

Bring a black pen with you.  You don't want to have to borrow this from someone else. Print everything the websites tell you to print, and in triplicate. Bring the exact amount of cash for payments, plus extra.  Bring all your IDs, even if they end up not asking you for them.  And as I mentioned above, never put yourself in a position where you have to negotiate or discuss with any government employee. You will never get anywhere. Everything is in black and white in their world, and they don't look at it as their job to help you or to go the extra mile. Your job is to follow instructions to the letter and minimize any discussions or any situation where you have to ask them for anything.

I hope this post will help you if you're ever in a similar situation, and make your life a little bit easier.

Good luck!